I cried at Mardi Gras, then found a superhero

So, Mardi Gras was fun. Slightly smaller crowds (just enough to make the holiday more bearable) and still plenty of parades, fun costumes, and Bloody Marys. It was my second Mardi Gras in three years -- the first of which was attended with Kate and Dominic also -- and it was great, except for a little while on Tuesday.

I arrived at the Louis Armstrong airport on Sunday, my chauffeur Dale picked me up and then we went back to his place to begin the festivities. We made it to one parade that day, or was it two, but stayed pretty low key with his nice flask to keep us company. The whole trip was generally low key and we didn't go out as much as usual. Maybe that's because most of the city is still inoperable and lots of restaurants and bars are not open or have hours that limit our getting food after 8pm.

We went to his friend Michael Depp's (who interviewed me for Reuters at Mardi Gras two years ago) place for a Bacchus party on Sunday evening, walked to the parade and then holed up in Michael's house with Allison to get our snacks in privacy. It was fun.

Monday was more parades and drinks until that evening when the Orpheus parade rolled. Dale had heard that Steven Seagal was the king/marshall/the person on the front float, so that was funny, but then came the exciting part. The sign introducing the second float said "Scarlett Johansson and Josh Hartnett," and I responded with stunned suspicion. Sometimes Mardi Gras floats are just tributes to things, events, or people, and with Orpheus' theme "Signs and Superstitions," I didn't think there would be famous people too. But Harry Connick Jr's krewe totally pulled through on this one to have several famous people, but of course the most important one was Scarlett Johansson and Josh Hartnett by association (I think they're dating).

I love Scarlett Johansson! Total girl crush. And there she was, just as close as Elijah Wood two years ago, but those of you who either experienced my Elijah Wood-Mardi Gras freak out or heard about it will be happy to know that I did not react quite so strongly this year to famous people I saw in a parade. I conjured up my cheerleading voice and excitedly screamed, "Oh my god, it's really them!" Remember I didn't know if it was the real "them" or a tribute to "them" for some strange reason...and I was dazed after having just seen Steven Seagal. Alas Josh was the only one facing my side of the street, but he heard me yell, kind of laughed at me and threw me a long strand of large gold beads. Famous men throw me beads at Mardi Gras -- even if I do have to fight children for them. Like I said Scarlett was facing away from me (don't you love how its my side of the street and away from me?), but I did see the back of her head and her updo was lovely and quite festive.

Seeing Scarlett Johansson in a parade just solidified my decision to get a new body piercing. I've had the itch to get tattooed or pierced for a while, but I recently noticed Ms. Johansson's ear piercing on the Vanity Fair cover where she was naked with Kiera Knightly and Tom Ford. It's the little middle part of the ear called the tragus; the part that you can kind of push over your ear canal to close your ears. But more on that later.

Mardi Gras day started out great. I was happy with my costume, and Dale, Allison and I were having a good time getting ready. And I was having a great hair day, very all-American girl curls. Allison drove us down in her truck and then we walked to the French Quarter and this was my downfall. I had gone into the city and bought TWO pairs of shoes to go with my sexy Uncle Sam costume. One pair of royal blue, glitter-covered maryjanes and a pair of silver go-go boots. I chose the boots that morning 'cause the glitter was already rubbing my feet, and though they first felt comfortable, they had no padding and the walk to the French Quarter KILLED. I sat down at the R Bar and had a Bloody Mary, but it quickly became obvious that I would have to either go home or get out of the shoes. I cried. Without knowing it or really meaning to, I cried (just a little) on Mardi Gras 'cause me feet hurt so bad.

That's when Allison and Dale knew it was serious. After I asked about going back to Dale's to change shoes, Allison recommended that I just take them off until I found new shoes to buy. I reluctantly did this. Yes, I walked around the French Quarter on Mardi Gras with my boots slung over my shoulder. I stuck to the sidewalk which was pretty clean and very few people noticed though I was totally humiliated at having made such a poor shoe choice and also slightly afraid for my personal health.

But Dale saved me. He walked in front of me to point out possible hazards and went very slow to make sure he didn't lose me. Then he took me to a store and bought me flipflops that still matched my costume. He was wonderful and I will never stop thanking him. He's my Mardi Gras superhero...CrazyPantsShirtlessManWithATuxedoJacketAndABeret. That's his name.

After that, Mardi Gras was soooo much fun. We trapsed all around partyhopping, getting lunch, buying drinks, and generally being fabulous in costume as one does on Mardi Gras. We saw a band and danced (but not Dale) and ended the night at the Bulldog, one of my favorite bars in NO for a reason I can't quite explain -- we just get each other, where Dale ordered and fetched food for me and Allison. And then there was sleeping which was good too.